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Lyrics:
This is not what I want This 2020 longing for the sun Of a different dawn But I cannot imagine everyone That I’ve ever loved Standing in the rearview of someone Who didn’t care enough To keep them I know that’s not the truth Most of me may never leave Duluth But what else can I do? 27, never have I moved Can You make this new? Lately, I’ve been barely getting through With the Pacific blue Calling me to You If I come home again Will these houses look the same? If I come home again Will they brighten at my name? If I come home again Could I see the snow in the morning? It can’t snow where I’m going Give me some sort of strength To hold me as my heart begins to break It’s goodbye I can’t take But I want to be faithful for Your sake In uncertain wake Georgia rain and rising water stakes Or the ghost of Blake (Will the dead just bury their own?) Can I at least bring a friend? My prayers feel like bargains in the end Have You a knowing grin? No matter what You always seem to win But You want what I want So why am I afraid of a new sun? Do I test Your love? Forgive me If I don’t come home again Will there be another night? If I don’t come home again Will I have the will to fight? If I don’t come home again A red sky dawn, a sailor’s warning
If I don’t come home... You can tear down every wall I’ve ever known I will not test You I won’t call down anything To spend it all on nothing more than Idols of rest You know this won’t be forever Could this be my last new decade? Oh God But if this hill crests You won’t find my body sleeping I’ll be running like I’m still a young man Beating my breast To the beat of Your heart Coming apart to be made whole All in one hand I will not test You Come LA County Devil’s bounty on our heads Just keep me faithful In my distress You have always come through Lies come untrue Nightmare over, leave me thankful We have been rescued I won’t break down Devastate myself to be saved? I’ve been chosen I will not best You I’m writing down the places I’ve been broken in To love what’s unbroken So keep breaking me down
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