N-I-N-T-E-N-D-O, lock the doors, bar the windows, I'm thinking 'bout one thing this week though, Mario
Bros. 1 through 3, and Tetris and Metroid, I destroyed, I'm the best boy, bring it your chest boy, next up, Legend of Zelda, then hit it up with a little bit of Double Dribble, 2 points, 3 points, 2 buttons, don't touch it, I'm rough with it, switch from B to A to A to B with the speed, don't play with me, digits are blistered again, soak them in vinegar and linament, then begin again, sensai of Ninja Gaiden, I've been playing it since ten, Kung Fu guru, 8-bit Mega Man, malevolant manic competitor, I'm a veteran at it, if you know better than that then sit down and go practice, "Oh he's the baddest!", thanks Mom, aren't you glad to know your son's the bomb at something, it's better than nothing, at least it ain't dragons & dungeons

I've got Nintendo thumb
Dang, dawg, my thumb's so numb
This controller is controlling me
It makes me feel so dumb
Why don't you come get some?
I know that you don't want none
If you did, you'd get it
Cause I'd give it to you
Sit down, son

I mastered the 8-bit masterpiece, when I was a little kid I was bound to be a digital athlete, it came
naturally, I didn't ask to be, gifted when I'm kicking it with Kid Icarus, I'm victorious or I won't play at all, I won't take a loss, I won't push pause, I'll turn the game off, RBI or Tecmo Bowl or Bases Loaded, it's game over, never gonna be intimidated, innovative is my middle name, a legitimate claim, I'm bringing the pain, call me Top Gun, I hunt ducks with a shot gun, not a pistol, you're pitiful, I'm Robocop, that's literal, girlies whistle cause I'm a fit as a fiddle, nerdy and burly, and surely they don't deserve me if they can't come in first place on Excitebike, I'm the type of guy who can cover my eyes and beat you by a couple of miles while you're struggling while I'm chuckling loud, chuckling loud, can't you see, you ain't got a chance with me, I'm a pro, you're amateur see, mark my words, thinking you can handle me will be your Final Fantasy

Contra, Castlevania, Duck Tales, Wrestlemania, California Games, Shinobi, get a power pad, you still can't hold me, who's dumber than this, who's thumb's number than this, who's the next chump on the list taking a beating of a lifetime, one that they're not gonna forget
Get your thumbs up (x8)