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08. Fan Mail

The Yearbook
by KJ-52


My arms are sliced up but Iím not embarrassed
Itís the only way I get attention now from my parents
Itís not like they really take the time to be caring
They just use me to watch the baby when they run they errands
My name is ______ I got a friend named Karen
She gave me your CD with the track for Eminem
You wrote a song called #1 fan I listened and
I wanted to know if you can help me like you was helping them
She had something even harder to be mentioning
Like every single day I struggle just with fitting in
Plus the boys wonít give me no attention and
I get teased and made fun of by all my friends and then
See Iím feeling like Iím wishing now that I could end
My life cuz Iím sick and tired of all the time I spend
Trying to figure out how I could be worth anything
Can u help me KJ from your fan

Iím writing this letter
Cause I have to tell ya
I need some help from you
Iím writing this letter
I hope that you get it
I need some help from you

I live with my mom ever since my parents split
And At home I spend my time on the Internet
Looking at porn Im addicted and Iím sick of it
Myspace dot com is mostly where Iím getting it
On top of that thereís videos that I can watch
And I really wanna quit but its like I canít stop
See Iím scared that Iím just gonna get caught
And when I see a girl all I think is dirty thoughts
And its not that I donít know that itís really wrong
But its right there for me every time Iím logging on
I got all your CDís I really like your songs
Well I downloaded em but anyway moving on
My screen name is KJ-52 is the bomb
I want to do a website KJ rockís dot com
I really some help cuz I canít tell my Mom
Oh by the way my real name is ________

Iím writing this letter
Cause I have to tell ya
I need some help from you
Iím writing this letter
I hope that you get it
I need some help from you

I took the time just to write you
We play you every Wednesday at my youth group
I love your music and we all think that youís cool
But I been struggling ever since I moved to a new school
See everybody thinks that Iím the perfect Christian girl
I had a hard time trying to believe that God is real
Iíve been on mission trips and camps the whole deal
My dad had cancer tho I prayed that God would heal
But he died anyway so itís hard to feel
Like he cares about me so was it Godís will
To take away my dad I really got a raw deal
Sometimes I just want to swallow all my momís pills
When I pray I really doubt it
Iíve lost my way or maybe Iíve never found it
I been smoking and drinking nobody knows about it
By the way my name is _____ donít mispronounce itÖ

If I could write to every kid thatís out there
Every kid thatís hurting feels like nobody cares
I would tell them that God can wipe away tear
And he's right near and I would say it quite clear
Your here for a reason youíre not a mistake
You are a special creation that God himself made
To the victims of abuse to every girl that was raped
You can live you can be free from your pain
And find strength and no longer be ashamed
You can find peace and hope In Jesus name
You aint gotta live with this hurt every day
Christ came to give you life in a much better way
To every kid right now thatís full of hate
And bitterness I'd tell em just to give it all away
To the one that came to take all the blame
Thatís what Iíd write hereís what Iíd say

(J. Sorrentino, E. Lautenbach) Produced by: KJ-52 Vocals: Jamie Fraley Piano: Eric Lautenbach Bass: Rich Gilliland BGVís : S. Marlowe, J. ďSAĒ Torres, P. St. Hilaire, M. Adigun, D. St. Hilaire, , J. Noa, * KJFIVETWOMUSIC (seasac)/ BEC MUSIC RECORDINGS (seasac) * E-Train Productions (ASCAP)




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