Brandon Haefke: Madison and I have been married for 9 years, and we have been playing music together even longer than that- we actually met in college playing on the campus worship band together! Madison studied Music and English and currently stays at home with our children, while I have a "normal job." We have been leading worship in church as a couple for many years, but writing and sharing our own music like this is a brand new adventure for us.

Madison Haefke: It all started with this crazy pileup of hard things happening. Back in the summer of 2023, I was pregnant with our fourth baby, and Brandon's dad Mark had been diagnosed with a super treatable form of cancer. Right before my due date, Dad had a rare reaction to his chemotherapy and died suddenly. So in the wake of this, our baby Judah is born, we're grieving, up all night with this sweet tiny baby to love, and then a few weeks later, Brandon finds out that HE has cancer. (Even now, two years later, I'm typing this going…. This is so whack.)

To (attempt to) abbreviate what is obviously a very long story, we move our family up to Minnesota for six weeks of cancer treatment, because he needed a special type of radiation treatment that wasn't available anywhere closer. We get there, and find out that Brandon's start date has been delayed a week due to insurance red tape. So cancer is growing in his body, and all we can do is wait, and pray, and cry, and hope… and change lots and lots of tiny diapers. Meanwhile, my baby journal is just empty, because I couldn't write. Paralysis… there was nothing to say. I couldn't listen to music, because there's nothing like a song to make you feel things, and everything was either too much pain without hope, or so much "it'll all be okay" that I couldn't bear it, in the middle of our waiting. I had nothing.

In the middle of this void, out of nowhere, God started giving us songs. And I don't mean that in a cutesy metaphorical way. I mean that at 2 a.m., I was awake nursing the baby, and a song landed in my mouth fully formed, words and music, and I got out my notes app and started typing. In the course of that week of waiting for cancer treatment to begin, the first six songs all came to us in similar ways, at similarly improbable times. We sang them to each other and we sang them to our kids, and it felt like God was giving us a means to process our pain in a deeply personal, specific-to-us way. By the end of the month, there were 11 songs.

A few months later, the only people who knew about the songs were family and friends. And gently, as we came out of the worst of it, they started to ask us, "Is it possible, maybe, these songs aren't just for you?"

Madison: I think what makes this music unique is that we didn't set out to write, and these songs came at what I would have previously called the least likely time. So the songs were already there, but God had to literally fling doors open and then shove us through them before we got the message that this music might be for sharing. But now it's like, of course it was.

Brandon: I think the hard part was living it. I am a very independent person- to a fault. But going through this trial put us into a position where we had no choice but to ask others for help. Learning to ask others for help (prayer, advice, assistance, etc) from a position of a true need was intensely vulnerable, and really stretched me. Compared to that…sharing these songs just felt like a natural way to thank everyone who helped us through.

Madison: No edits. This is very unique for us - any music we've written, before or since, usually will change shape between the first draft and final version - but each of the songs on this album are essentially exactly the same as when they first came to us.

Brandon: The only song that is an exception is "Remake Me." I actually wrote that song a month before my cancer diagnosis - with absolutely no idea what was on the horizon.

Now fast forward two years, when we are almost done tracking…after everything we had been through, some of the lyrics just weren't right anymore. The original lyrics in the bridge basically recited some of the "right answers" we often throw around when people are suffering. But I've since learned that when we're in the midst of dark times, what we really need isn't right answers. We need the presence of God, and of those that love us.

So I re-wrote the bridge. The new lyrics tell of what I personally experienced in my walk with God as I made my way through this trial. They are more honest, and hopefully will be more helpful to others as well. Re-writing that bridge was a nice bookend to the songwriting process of the album.

Madison: It is really a sendup of all the unhelpful things that people might say to someone who is suffering. Since sharing this song, we've had folks tell us their own horror stories -- family members telling them they didn't trust God if they accepted the medicine the doctor prescribed. (Oh my!) Church members asking if they or their parents had some unconfessed sin in their life that might have caused their congenital heart condition. (Ack, no!) Sometimes you can laugh these things off… but when you're in pain, even kind sentiments that are just mild and vague can make your blood boil if they happen to catch you at the wrong time. I had to learn to give myself grace for those feelings. In suffering, anger is just anguish wearing a different costume.

I grew up in a Christian culture where "if the Lord brought you to it, he would bring you through it," and "If you don't have something nice to say, don't say it at all." It was healing (and hilarious) to let myself sing all the clapbacks that I would never, ever say. And humor disarms us.

But the humbling truth is this: Even people who have gone through their own pain don't always know how to be there for someone who's suffering. And even after everything Brandon and I have been through, sometimes we say the wrong thing too. Pain is universal… and it isn't. And part of being human and flawed is that sometimes we just make mistakes. Sometimes you can laugh about it, and sometimes it really isn't funny at all, and you ask for forgiveness, and show each other grace.

Brandon: "My Father's World" has been one of our family's favorite hymns for years, one that we often sing to and with our children. We love how it points to God's heart through the simple act of paying attention to the world he made. But it wasn't until going through this trial that we realized the real point of the song lies in Verse 3: "Though the wrong seems oft so strong, God is the ruler yet."

The chaos of life (death, loss, anxiety - you name it) that we are all living through can make us feel so disoriented. There's something about stepping outside and beholding the natural world that connects us back to reality in a really unique way.

Often in the wake of tragedy there are just no words. But sometimes, the rustling of grass and the carol of birds can bring healing that words can't find.

Brandon: We will take that as a compliment- we love The Arcadian Wild! In chronological order, some of my biggest influences have been the singers of the Great American Songbook (Sinatra, Ella, and the gang), Relient K, The Oh Hellos, Five Iron Frenzy, Kings Kaleidoscope, Andrew Peterson, and Josh Garrels.

Madison: Ooh, I would second all those. Old jazz/swing standards captured my heart when I was little. Others - Kings K, Rend Collective, Citizens, Sara Bareilles, Kacey Musgraves, Norah Jones. My first loves were Stevie Wonder and Billy Joel. And we would be remiss if we didn't shout out Randall Goodgame's Slugs and Bugs albums for getting us through countless road trips with small children.

Brandon: Nothing is ever wasted.

Brandon: We have already played a few shows locally with our band (shout out to Matthew, Cameron, Anthony, Mark, and Coach Cain!), and we may play some more as opportunities arise. But we don't have any plans to try to go on the road right now.

Most of the songs we have written since finishing the album are tailored toward singing in a worship setting. Our next project is going to be recording some of these, mostly to share them with our local church. But depending how well the tracks turn out we may publish some as well. :]

Brandon: I'd take the mountains and skip the castle - unless it's a moss-covered ruin with lots of crevices to explore!

Madison: Ah, the beach. Sand and sunshine for me, please!