Get the new FREE JFH MP3 compilation -- Vol. 14!
Get the new FREE JFH MP3 compilation -- Vol. 14!

JFH Song Lyrics

  Artist List   /   John Reuben   /   Professional Rapper


         


03. I Haven't Been Myself

Professional Rapper
by John Reuben



 

I’m not alright, I haven’t been myself lately
I’m not okay with the way I’ve let my thoughts overtake
Take me away to the place I should have gone
I hope I’m not here for long
I’ll see you when I’m better
I'll see you when I'm better

It’s gotta get worse to get better
It went from no way, never to okay, whatever
Slowly but surely and sure as sure is blurry
Now things that once were me are no longer
Every so often God reminds me
But I’m always there in front to blind me
I value my pride more than peace of mind
My precious pride
There was a time when I had control but I let it go
I watched the world pass in slowmo
My life’s ahead of me
I can’t catch up
Stuck in a rut
I went too willingly
These thoughts are killing me
I wish I could control myself but I can’t
Or can I?
Man I’m gone
I hope I’m not here for long
It’s just a visit
Ashamed of who I’ve become
It’s not really me
Or is it?

I’m not alright, I haven’t been myself lately
I’m not okay with the way I’ve let my thoughts overtake
Take me away to the place I should have gone
I hope I’m not here for long
I’ll see you when I’m better

Thoughts lead to emotion which led to action
I hate the fact that it happened
“The Lord can forgive and forget”
But I’m not able to do it
Maybe there is where the problem lies
I’m unable to forgive myself plus I’m too proud to ask for help
Whelp, sorry for who I’ve become
I guess circumstances can leave you numb
Plus, I refused accountability
It seemed like such small things you found in me
I called you secluded and illuded to the fact that your concerns were silly
Don’t over-react
Now looking back in hindsight, heh
I’m able to see that you were right
Is it too late for me?
I know it’s not
It’s just up to me to choose to stop

I’m not alright, I haven’t been myself lately
I’m not okay with the way I’ve let my thoughts overtake
Take me away to the place I should have gone
I hope I’m not here for long
I’ll see you when I’m better

 

 

 

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This Friday, November 14, 2025
ALBUMS
Bethel Music We Must Respond (Deluxe) [Bethel]
Emery White Line Fever (Remastered) - Disc One (independent)
FYR FYTR Snow After Fire - EP (independent)
HolyName Three Bar Cross - EP (independent)
Jake and Mates Songs of Deliverance (independent)
JERICKO Ups and Downs - EP [Syntax]
Kings Kaleidoscope Asaph's Arrows II EP [BEC]
VIC LUCAS The Journey (Deluxe Version) [Syntax]
Ronnie Martin Evergreen Melodie [Velvet Blue]
NF FEAR - EP [Capitol]
Blessing Offor To All A Good Night [Capitol CMG]
Rave Jesus I MET GOD ON THE DANCEFLOOR [Provident]
Kristian Stanfill Come to Jesus [sixstepsrecords]
We Are Messengers Rejoice! (A Celtic Christmas) [Curb]
The Young Escape Not Done Yet [BEC]

SINGLES
ADRIEL CRUZ & JAMIL Praying For My Enemies - Single [Syntax]
BILL B. My Lord - Single [Syntax]
Biscuits Drifting Off (Hayloft) - Single [Circle Back]
Holly Brand Tennessee Christmas (feat. Warren Peay) - Single [Integrity]
Leanna Crawford Still Waters (Strings & Choir Version) - Single [Provident]
Melvin Crispell III, Jason Clayborn Whatever It Is - Single [Tyscot]
CUTRIGHT, ZIPPY, & QEW Pick it Up - Single [Syntax]
DRENAE Like U Do - Single [Syntax]
Eighteen Mile What Mercy Means - Single [Mountain Home Music]
His Kingdom Suffers There's No Light In This House - Single [Charon Collective]
KNALADEUS, SELAH THE CORNER, & AYO SHAMIR Let it Be (ft. JOSEPH SD) - Single [Syntax]
LEXLY NIRVANA Perdoname - Single [Syntax]
Richard Lynch Why Me Lord - Single [MTS]
Jamie MacDonald My Family - Single [Capitol CMG]
NEEDTOBREATHE Where You Call Home - Single [Omnivore]
Hunter Plake Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas - Single [BEC]
Skillet O Come, O Come Emmanuel - Single [Hear It Loud]

Next Sunday, November 16, 2025
ALBUMS
Bir Witness 26.13 (independent)

Next Thursday, November 20, 2025
SINGLES
The Rocky Valentines Happy Thanksgiving - Double Single [Velvet Blue]

Next Friday, November 21, 2025
ALBUMS
Drew Holcomb & the Neighbors, Ellie Holcomb I'll Be Home for Christmas - EP [Magnolia]
Joseph Habedank The Great Adventure: A Tribute to Steven Curtis Chapman [Daywind]
Andrew Marcus Christmas - EP (independent)
Stryper The Greatest Gift Of All [Frontiers]

SINGLES
Cliff & Antoinette Murray Happy Thanksgiving - Single [DREAM]
Good Weather Forecast Little Christmas - Single [DREAM]
Jake MacAdam, Mark & Sarah Tillman Christ Has Come - Single [Ocean House]
Life.Church Worship A Thousand Blessings - Single [Ocean House]
Seph Schlueter Cling To The Cross (feat. Matt Maher) - Single [sixsteps]

VINYL
Stryper The Greatest Gift Of All Vinyl [Girder]


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