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Professional Rapper  cover
03. I Haven't Been Myself
Album: Professional Rapper
Artist: John Reuben
         
 
I’m not alright, I haven’t been myself lately
I’m not okay with the way I’ve let my thoughts overtake
Take me away to the place I should have gone
I hope I’m not here for long
I’ll see you when I’m better
I'll see you when I'm better

It’s gotta get worse to get better
It went from no way, never to okay, whatever
Slowly but surely and sure as sure is blurry
Now things that once were me are no longer
Every so often God reminds me
But I’m always there in front to blind me
I value my pride more than peace of mind
My precious pride
There was a time when I had control but I let it go
I watched the world pass in slowmo
My life’s ahead of me
I can’t catch up
Stuck in a rut
I went too willingly
These thoughts are killing me
I wish I could control myself but I can’t
Or can I?
Man I’m gone
I hope I’m not here for long
It’s just a visit
Ashamed of who I’ve become
It’s not really me
Or is it?

I’m not alright, I haven’t been myself lately
I’m not okay with the way I’ve let my thoughts overtake
Take me away to the place I should have gone
I hope I’m not here for long
I’ll see you when I’m better

Thoughts lead to emotion which led to action
I hate the fact that it happened
“The Lord can forgive and forget”
But I’m not able to do it
Maybe there is where the problem lies
I’m unable to forgive myself plus I’m too proud to ask for help
Whelp, sorry for who I’ve become
I guess circumstances can leave you numb
Plus, I refused accountability
It seemed like such small things you found in me
I called you secluded and illuded to the fact that your concerns were silly
Don’t over-react
Now looking back in hindsight, heh
I’m able to see that you were right
Is it too late for me?
I know it’s not
It’s just up to me to choose to stop

I’m not alright, I haven’t been myself lately
I’m not okay with the way I’ve let my thoughts overtake
Take me away to the place I should have gone
I hope I’m not here for long
I’ll see you when I’m better

 

More Lyrics from Professional Rapper

  1. 01. Move
  2. 02. Have No Opinion?
  3. 03. I Haven't Been Myself
  4. 04. Life Is Short
  5. 05. Treats
  6. 06. Freedom To Feel
  7. 07. Time to Leave
  8. 08. Re-Record
  9. 09. Jammin' John & Mixin' Manny
  10. 10. All In All
  11. 11. 5 Years To Write
  12. 12. Higher
                 
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This Friday, July 31
ALBUMS
Pat Barrett, Worship Together Burn in Us [Capitol CMG]
Joseph Habedank The Worship Album [Gaither]
Sower Contrast (independent)
Starflyer 59 Disappointed E.P. [Velvet Blue]

SINGLES
99 APEX Move - Single [Syntax]
A Mose Spirit Rhythm - Single [Syntax]
Hillside Recording Come Back Home - Single (independent)
JusRzd, Cyrus Sonata, & Mic Wise LHM - Single [Syntax]
KNGDM REVIVAL OPEN MY EYES - Single [Dream]
MotionPlus, Braille Overdue - Single [Gospel Banquet]
Jeannie Ortega Sorry - Single [Syntax]
Drew Parker Blame Jesus (feat. Steven Curtis Chapman) - Single (independent)
Razzie & DTG Rich EEH - Single [Syntax]
We Are Messengers Room For You - Single [Wings]

VINYL
IONA IONA vinyl box set Vinyl (independent)

Next Wednesday, August 5
ALBUMS
Life.Church Switch Simple - EP (independent)

Next Friday, August 7
ALBUMS
The Choir Dragonfly [Galaxy 21]
John Elefante Stories: The John Elefante Collection [Girder]

SINGLES
29:11 Worship Child of God - Single [Dream]
Francesca Battistelli He Will - Single [Curb]
Josh Grove Trust (Psalm 13) - Single (independent)
Allan Scott Everybody Needs Someone - Single [Dream]
Good Weather Forecast, SOFYKA NOMADIC TENDENCIES - Single [Dream]
Carly Ann Taylor Lifeline - Single [Wings]


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