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Professional Rapper  cover
03. I Haven't Been Myself
Album: Professional Rapper
Artist: John Reuben
         
 

I’m not alright, I haven’t been myself lately
I’m not okay with the way I’ve let my thoughts overtake
Take me away to the place I should have gone
I hope I’m not here for long
I’ll see you when I’m better
I'll see you when I'm better

It’s gotta get worse to get better
It went from no way, never to okay, whatever
Slowly but surely and sure as sure is blurry
Now things that once were me are no longer
Every so often God reminds me
But I’m always there in front to blind me
I value my pride more than peace of mind
My precious pride
There was a time when I had control but I let it go
I watched the world pass in slowmo
My life’s ahead of me
I can’t catch up
Stuck in a rut
I went too willingly
These thoughts are killing me
I wish I could control myself but I can’t
Or can I?
Man I’m gone
I hope I’m not here for long
It’s just a visit
Ashamed of who I’ve become
It’s not really me
Or is it?

I’m not alright, I haven’t been myself lately
I’m not okay with the way I’ve let my thoughts overtake
Take me away to the place I should have gone
I hope I’m not here for long
I’ll see you when I’m better

Thoughts lead to emotion which led to action
I hate the fact that it happened
“The Lord can forgive and forget”
But I’m not able to do it
Maybe there is where the problem lies
I’m unable to forgive myself plus I’m too proud to ask for help
Whelp, sorry for who I’ve become
I guess circumstances can leave you numb
Plus, I refused accountability
It seemed like such small things you found in me
I called you secluded and illuded to the fact that your concerns were silly
Don’t over-react
Now looking back in hindsight, heh
I’m able to see that you were right
Is it too late for me?
I know it’s not
It’s just up to me to choose to stop

I’m not alright, I haven’t been myself lately
I’m not okay with the way I’ve let my thoughts overtake
Take me away to the place I should have gone
I hope I’m not here for long
I’ll see you when I’m better


 

More Lyrics from Professional Rapper

  1. 01. Move
  2. 02. Have No Opinion?
  3. 03. I Haven't Been Myself
  4. 04. Life Is Short
  5. 05. Treats
  6. 06. Freedom To Feel
  7. 07. Time to Leave
  8. 08. Re-Record
  9. 09. Jammin' John & Mixin' Manny
  10. 10. All In All
  11. 11. 5 Years To Write
  12. 12. Higher
                 
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This Friday, October 9
ALBUMS
Mat Kearney Hanging by a Heartstring (independent)
The Rocky Valentines Happy Halloween - EP [Velvet Blue]
SIGNUM REGIS Beyond Spacetime [Fireflash]
Skillet After The Storm - EP [Hear It Loud]

SINGLES
Chris Caro WHAT WOULD HAPPEN? - Single [Syntax]
Chandler Letner Anyway - Single [Dream]
John Long All To Him I Owe - Single (independent)
Myles Maestro BABYLON - Single [Syntax]
outr.cty Frieza (ft. tonyxtrotter & Q-Flo) - Single [Syntax]
QEW & Cyrus Sonata Toonami Mindz (ft. JLøve) - Single [Syntax]

Andy Riemersma I PRAISE YOU - Single [Dream]

Next Friday, October 16
ALBUMS
Josh Baldwin Worth Everything [Bethel]
Grace Frances Clothed with Dignity (independent)
Jamie MacDonald Jamie MacDonald (The Deluxe Album) [Capitol CMG]
Northview Worship Awaken to Wonder (Live From the Conservatory) [BEC]
Jenna Raine Jeans, Boys & Jesus (Deluxe) [Warner]
Unteachers Under Bright Sadness [Rottweiler]

SINGLES
Riley Clemmons For The Boy - Single [Capitol CMG]
Charly Perry In the Middle - Single [Gotee]
Slow Salvation Wait Around Another Day - Single [Velvet Blue]


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