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  Artist List   /   Confessions of a Traitor   /   Punishing Myself Before God Does





01. Punishing Myself Before God Does

Punishing Myself Before God Does
by Confessions of a Traitor



 

 

Redemption is not just about survival
It is one lost souls revival
Would you call my name,
Or cast me to the flame?

Redemption is not just about survival
It is one lost souls revival
Would you call my name,
Or cast me to the flame?

It’s like a story that plays in the back of my head
Nowhere to hide, so face it instead
A voice screaming louder when you push it aside
Nowhere to run so look inside

God may forgive me, but I won’t
Forced to face my fears again
God may forgive me, but I won’t
I refuse to play pretend

It’s white noise in a dark room
Clawing out from your skin
Echoes tower over me, echoes tower over me

God may forgive me, but I won’t
Forced to face my fears again
God may forgive me, but I won’t
This suffering will end

Now I can't see my own face
It’s blinded by the shame
Would you call my name
Now you tell me everything
Is going to be okay
Would you call my name

Would you call my name?
Or cast me to the flame?

Fear is the tax that conscience pays to guilt
Please have mercy on my soul
Is the guilt that I’ve got, the good I didn’t do?
I’ll punish myself before God does
I’ll punish myself before God does


Now I can't see my own face
It’s blinded by the shame
Would you call my name
You tell me everything
Is going to be okay
Would you call my name

Would you call my name?
Or cast me to the flame?

God may forgive me, but I won’t
Turn to face my fears this time
God may forgive me, but I won’t
This suffering will end


 

 

 

 

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This Friday, November 28, 2025
ALBUMS
Seth Davey Words in the Wounds (independent)
Emery White Line Fever (Remastered) - Disc Two (independent)
Illustrate, Procyse In The Name (Remixes) [Polished Arrow]
John P. Kee Throwback: An Evening with John P. Kee, Part 1 [Tyscot]
Kelo The Healing Process 2: Grief [Syntax]
No Vain Glory UNLEADED [Syntax]
Jeannie Ortega Concrete Dreams [Syntax]
Phil Wickham Psalm 8 - EP [Fair Trade]
Calum Wood Christmas Songs from the Kitchen Table, Vol. 1 (independent)

SINGLES
Ashes Awaken For You - Single [MTS]
Ian Austin Simpler Times (feat. Heather Suzanne) - Single [Ocean House]
Chris Caro & OnBeatMusic Flicker - Single [Syntax]
Cutright Slide Thru - Single [Syntax]
Mark Fonseca No Vacancy - Single (independent)
Hillside Recording Unto Us - Single [Ocean House]
Knaladeus & Braille Iron Sharpens Iron - Single [Syntax]
Kemara Lynn Apply Pressure (feat. DKG KIE) - Single (independent)
Oscar Nash Peace on Earth (feat. Jemimah Paine) - Single (independent)
Saints in Exile & Cutright My Dead End (Orchestral Remix) ft. Jeannie Ortega, Jericko & Luc DiMarzio - Single [Syntax]
Silent Reflection Erase - Single [Syntax]
Tds Cam, De'Aris & Craig Watson, Wayne Klassik, & YAGIRLLAYC Prayers For My Enemies (Rapzilla Freshmen) - Single [Syntax]
TUVÍ, Yung Drew & 1KChvcho One Hundred (Rapzilla Freshmen) - Single [Syntax]

VINYL
John Schlitt The Christmas Project Vinyl [Girder]

Next Friday, December 5, 2025
SINGLES
29:11 Worship Glory Glory - Single [DREAM]
Cleansing Of The Temple Mary Did You Know? - Single [Rottweiler]
Heather Suzanne, Ian Austin Sleeping Child of Bethlehem - Single [Ocean House]
Living Again Dive Into - Single [Ocean House]
Seth Metoyer Flicker Of December - Single [Rottweiler/Broken Curfew]
Run51 Good News (A Christmas Medley) - Single [DREAM]


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